


Footsteps in the Dark

by BookshopLaura



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-28
Updated: 2014-04-28
Packaged: 2018-01-21 04:55:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 910
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1538387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BookshopLaura/pseuds/BookshopLaura
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to "Some Marks Remain".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Footsteps in the Dark

Merlin is sat on his bed, his legs crossed and his head resting against the wall. His right hand runs over and over the sore marks on his throat. In his mind he can still conjure the image of Arthur's terrible face. He can still feel Arthur's thumbs pressing like a vice on his adams apple. Can still feel the shock and fear of realising Arthur hates him, Arthur will kill him.

But Arthur didn't. It had taken Merlin a few moments to realise that Arthur had stopped. Except Merlin still couldn't breathe. Something was tied around his neck, he was sure, but he was too scared to try and remove it. Then Arthur had moved towards him again and Merlin knew now, now he would finish him off. Until Arthur had backed away again. It was like he was playing a game, like a cat with a mouse. But then he was going to the door. Hours later it seemed, Gaius had arrived. He'd spoken softly and calmly, which at first had confused Merlin. How can he be calm? But there wasn't anything at his neck, and as he calmed his breathing eased. Gaius had ushered him out of the room, but he remembers turning to look at Arthur. And Arthur looked upset, broken. He thinks he remembers Arthur begging forgiveness, but that's probably just his own imagination.

So he sits thinking, running his hands over and over his neck. He's only making it redder and burn more. Arthur hasn't sent guards to arrest him. What should he do? Should he run whilst he has a chance? Should he go and see Arthur? Maybe speak to Gwaine or Leon or Gwen. But then he'd have to say that Arthur tried to kill him. It sounds wrong even if it is true. And then he'd have to tell them that the reason was that he has magic. That he has hidden that from them all these years. They might understand, if he's lucky. But Arthur didn't. Merlin's best friend hadn't.

Merlin feels tears spring to his eyes for the first time. It's been hours and yet only now does he His hand springs to his mouth to suppress the cry that comes out, muffled anyway. And now he's shaking too. And now both hands are in front of him clenched as he struggles to stop crying. And then he doesn't try any more. He just cries. He doesn't know why he's shocked at Arthur's reaction. What more could he have expected? He didn't deserve any more than that.

He cries for what feels like an eternity. His eyes are raw, as well as his nose, which is still running. His throat is tight, and his sleeves are damp with snot and tears. He's cold and damp and numb and the night outside seems endless. Maybe it will never end. Maybe there will never be a morning. Even if the sunrises, Merlin doesn't feel like there will be a tomorrow for him.

He's staring into the space in front of him, the deep darkness that surrounds him on all sides seems to swallow him, cushion him. It doesn't feel real. Maybe, if Merlin hopes enough, he'll wake up and it'll be a terrible dream. Expect the thundering silence is pierced by the sound of Gaius' front door creaking open. And then there's the sound of quiet footsteps across the main chamber and up the stairs to Merlin's room. The blood pumping round Merlin's ears increases, like a river rushing, and yet he can still feel every gentle foot fall. The footsteps come to a halt outside his chamber door. Merlin looks hopelessly around in the dark for a place to hide, a means of escape.

There's a light knock on the door.

"Merlin?" the voice is meek, just above a whisper. For a moment Merlin stares at the black hole that is the door.

"Merlin, it's me. Can I come in?" Merlin takes a deep breath. The first yes is barely a breath so he tries again, his brow furrowing in an emotion that's hard to place. Stress is closest. Fear? Upset?

"Yes."

when Arthur walks in his shoulders are hunched and his head is bowed. He's fiddling with his arm in front of him.

"Merlin, I..." Arthur's voice is broken and upset. He can hear the tremor, the pitch is too high.

"I'm so ... sorry." There's a sob as he speaks and more as he finishes, sniffing joins it, and hiccups.

"I... couldn't sleep until you knew... how sorry I am." Merlin's taking deep breaths again, but it feels like relief. He makes a move to crawl forward and a yelp escapes his throat almost without his permission. But he doesn't care because now Arthur is here. His Arthur. Wrapping an arm around Merlin's waist and resting his face against Merlin's neck. His nose seems to nuzzle at the spot behind Merlin's ear. And he's warm and solid and real and he cares. His fingers card through Merlin's hair, soothing him with nonsense words. Arthur tears soak through Merlin's tunic.

And Merlin feels his heart steady as he clings to Arthur in return, his arms wrapping around Arthur's neck. Arthur's breathing steadies too.

"I'm sorry. I don't want you dead. Merlin. That's the last thing I want."

"I know." says Merlin.

They fall asleep with Arthur's arms round Merlin's waist, resting on his belt. And Merlin's hands gripping Arthur's shirt.


End file.
